I, for whatever reason, never got around to posting about work boyfriend, so let’s recap!
I met WB at, surpise!, work.
Within the first twenty minutes of starting, I was on the phone with IT
trying to get my computer to work. And
he was on the other end of the line.
Giving me shit. So, I dished it
right back. He ended up having to come
and fix things himself… and the shit talking continued.
We exchanged pleasantries- college studies, high school accolades,
ya know, the usual. I was smitten within
the first 20 seconds.
So, like any normal girl, I stalked him on Facebook. However, not being a normal girl, I stalked
him on Facebook while he was still in the cubicle.
No girlfriend.
He accepted and then modified our friendship saying we
worked together… immediately flags went off in my head and thought “he must
have just gotten out of a relationship or is talking to someone.”
To test the waters- I sent him a message (which after I
pressed “send” on, everyone told me NOT to send. Fortunately, I give zero fucks) that said, “While
you were practicing drama in high school, I was refining my detective (stalking) skills.”
He loved it like I suspected.
I spent the following month getting as much information about him as I could. Turns out he HAD just broken up with his girlfriend… because she had kids, wasn’t supposed to be able to have more kids, and he wasn’t sure he wanted kids at all… let alone kids that weren’t his. So, I dove in one night while I was out for a bachelorette party in Normal Heights. (Turns out he was also out and in the area.) We sent drunk messages back and forth to one another on Facebook until my phone was starting to die… and then I made him text me instead. And then we (drunk) texted until 3:30 in the morning. At the end of the conversation, he said, “You’re killing me over here. I want to experience this banter in person, let’s go to dinner on Tuesday and continue this face to face.”
So, Tuesday rolls around and he sends me a text that says, “how
about we nix the pho idea, and instead start at my house, walk to the bar, and
then walk to the food trucks. We can go
back to my house, smoke some hookah, and watch Netflix. You’re obviously more than welcome to stay
the night.” So, after work, I ran to Target (so convenient to have one across
the street!) and bought an outfit to wear the next day and headed to his house. As he cleaned his bathroom, I did a quick
over view of his room (I LOVE dissecting boys’ rooms!) and found the jackpot of
all jackpots in the closet.
We walked a total of probably 5 miles that night. Laughing the entire time. We had drinks, we held hands, we ordered
dinner, and as we were waiting for it, he looked at me, said “I really want to
kiss you right now” I giggled, and he said “fuck it” grabbed my face and kissed
me. We walked back to his house, on the
way stopping at the Larson’s (before they were married, mind you) so I could
pee, and then back to his house.
“When was the last time you did this?”
“What? Sleep in the bed and not have sex with someone?”“No, sleep next to someone who is clearly into you and just wants to tell you how pretty and amazing you are.”
In the morning, we got up (his alarm is “Here Comes the Sun”),
showered together, and headed to work.
*****
A week later or so, was the Larson wedding. I invited him to be my date, but he had other
plans (which ended up falling through) so afterwards, the Scientist and I
stumbled to his house. (He wasn’t
expecting me to bring a friend but was expecting me so he left the door unlocked.)
I crawl into bed next to him and wake him up, and introduce him to the
Scientist. He humored us, was completely
nice about the whole thing, and told us there was a blow up mattress in the
closet in the living room. Completely
unlike him, I couldn’t figure out why he wasn’t getting out of bed to blow it
up himself.
“Omg, you’re naked, aren’t you?!”
“I told you I’d be ready for you when you got here.”
And then I reached over and confirmed. Yep.
Definitely naked.
We blew up the air mattress and everyone went to sleep.
When the Larson’s got back from their honeymoon, I met up
with them for a couple drinks near WB’s house, so I invited him to join as
well. He said he didn’t want to spend
money but said I should come over after we were done… so I did. We smoked, and then laid on the bed laughing
for hours. HOURS. We laughed so much and so hard that my abs
literally were sore the next day. It
hurt to move. I have never met someone
who I’ve clicked with so well before.
And then we both got busy.
I was out of town, he was out of town, I had plans, he had plans. We didn’t hang out again until the beginning
of June… and that’s when it all fell apart.
He invited me over on a Sunday night to do drinks and dinner again. When we were walking back to his house to
watch Netflix (seriously, this was part of the original plan) he tells me that
he was getting back together with his ex-girlfriend because, “even though I don’t
know about the kids, I think she’s just too good to pass up.”
So, we got back to his house, he put on Scandal (because I
love it!) and I made him watch it with me… and then he put on House of Cards
and got into bed… I ended up passing out
through half of it, waking up, feeling really awkward and going home.
We haven’t hung out alone since then, but recently, new and
interesting things have come to light.
There’s still trouble in Paradise. She has trust issues and WB is a free
spirit. There’s a lot of friction there.
He’s still not sold on the kids. And they’re definitely not going away.
He told one of our co-workers that they haven’t broken up,
but alluded to the fact that it wasn’t far off.
And all of a sudden he’s texting me more. And inviting me to join his fantasy football
league next year. And inviting me to
Super Bowl parties.
I’m not about to be his rebound… but at the same time, I’m
secretly hoping for their demise because our chemistry is off the charts.
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